she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
he asked me to smell his eyeballs.
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
We invited our waitress tonight to come too.... we told her she had lightning in her veins and in return she taught us a Texas Roadhouse dance so the logical next step was invite her to a kegger.
You drink it until you puke in a vent one time and it's ruined forever.
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
It's not even 6 am and I've already told my mom to fuck herself in the face
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
i just swapped my iPhone for a happy meal. this is greg btw, the hooker let me borrow her phone
Are you rolling a joint while doing homework?
No, I am rolling a joint with my homework.
We got stoned and watched Disney movies all night. I think I'm in love.
Randomize
