I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
I smell stomach acid.
what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
You know its bad when you're praying for a hangover just so you aren't still drunk at work anymore.
I don't know what's worse, the fact that my parents own a sex swing or the fact that my little cousin was playing on it
I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
I know I'm not the first to fuck in a park but i deserve props for doing it at 3pm. On a sunny day might I add.
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
It's end St Patricks day. I'm gonna need a leash. And a bib. And a rain check on anything considered dignifying.
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
I left when you were using your mug to lay on the street and ask for spare change
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
I'm just hoping that with all the times he's puked in my yard a mushroom field might grow.
Randomize
