found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
Fuck men. I'm going to go eat a package of cookie dough and get fat. I hope I die of salmonella.
i put his shirt in a ziplock bag to preserve his smell
please tell me you are kidding me
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
Drunkenly bought a $240 realtor course last night. Apparently even drunk me thinks my future is going nowhere
Hey I came back and we made joints with the breathalyzers the cops left last night.
Oh my god I would go to planned parenthood the same day I get my nipples pierced
He's balder, I'm skinnier. I win. I. Win.
Apparently someone was hiding in a storm drain dressed as Pennywise from it and offering passersby free penis enlargement pills.
Ever try to swallow something and have it go up into your nose instead? Yeah, I just sneezed bacon.
I’ve looked at so many mouse vaginas in the past week
Randomize
