I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
After giving the pizza guy directions you told him to look for the big stupid looking kid outside in purple
The fish's death was accidental. We all said a few words at his funeral. Roomie wanted to play only the good die young as he swirled down the toilet bowl
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
you stumbled up the stairs in your heels, pulled 23 one-dollar bills out of your bra and then went and puked in the toilet. didnt say a single thing to me the whole time
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
What kind of costume was that supposed to be??
I'm an orgasm trader!
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
i'm teaching a bunch of people how to grow weed over snapchat. no shame.
The thought "Ummm which pants am I wearing? ...I *am* wearing pants, right?" just ran through my head. I'm done. So done.
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
I've had sex with three people who have this birthday.
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
Randomize
