; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
I know everyone screamed lady cop instead of cops. I wanted to apologize to her for our chauvinism
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
That's okay, during storytime I would have to sit on my hands so I wouldn't touch everyone. Explains a lot...
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
Bonus points if someone shits their pants. Only 1/2 bonus points if it's you
Bonus points are bonus points regardless
Beer and tomahawks! Not gonna end well!
She just walked up to him and was like "you should fuck Angela" and it worked! She is the ultimate wingman
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
Here's the thing. Kinda drunk. Eating leftover soup. In bed. Watching Disney channel.
Since moving to the suburbs, all I do is fuck my ex and watch cartoons. It's not so bad.
Randomize
