Why is it that every time I type the word "give" my phone spells out HIV?! You know how many people i've told I want to HIV them something!
he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
Seeing him suck some chick's face on VH1 wasn't exactly how I imagined the "we should see other people" conversation going.
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
i think every time you texted me i responded with 'bathroom floor'
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
You can't find true love with Budweiser and a futon
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
You do realize how pathetic it is when the woman who does your bikini waxes has seen your vagina more than I have
What's the standard Christmas present for six months of booty calls?
Mobile recharge?
Hey texans ride hard. He should have known what he was in for when I asked to sit on his face. The broken nose was a BADGE he just earned.
I'd cum for enchiladas.
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
If you can't drink with the big boys, give up your beer and go back to the playpen
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
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