is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
alright so where did all these fingerpaintings on my bedroom wall come from?
dude. you drew those with your dick
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
We are gonna be 90 years old in wheelchairs at the nursing home sitting at computers poking each other and waiting for the other to die so we will have the last facebook poke.
Housekeeping just called to see if we were okay bc they came in the room earlier and we didn't move.
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
they superglued a cigarette to my fingers...i think I need to quit smoking.
Yea he doesn't really know about any of this yet but my game plan is to keep wowing him with my vagina and cooking skills. It's up too future me to handle the rest.
You fucked a stripper on your sisters friends blow up mattress. The least you could do is wash the sheets.
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
When someone's woman crush wednesday is an ultrasound of her unborn daughter...
I can't
Turns out both me and my grandpa have a guilty pleasure for South American men.
You're like the fucking Mozart of sexting.
he asked me why I let you steal the gnome, and you jumped out of the bathroom, yelled "you know why!" and ran outside with said gnome
Randomize
