Don't you send me to vm
this kid down the hall keeps banging on his drums...i feel like i'm living in jumanji
Just saw the true definition of the muffin top and camel toe all on one person at the DC zoo... Tried to take a pic but she got away..
I'm like a warm blanket that has sex with you
Im about to have a threesome, Ill pay you twenty bucks to go clean my room. Just throw it all in the closet.
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Run away.
I'm not a home wrecker but if one more married man with a yacht asks me to go scuba diving I'm NOT saying no
Bro that's the last time I try to stick my penis in a bowl of jello. I can't believe your sister ate that, did she not see my dick mold
So wait. Let me get this straight lol... you... are are considering offering fetish services to "trample and own" someone for $80 in order to pay for someone to come organize ur shit? Pure genius.
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
I took a sleeping pill while he was in the bathroom. Time for a game of how long can we bang before I fall asleep.
You are both horrible and amazing
You're the second person to offer to fuck me in the bathroom at work. Idk whether I should feel honored, or if cvs is just a turn on.
So today was the first day i've been sober since Wednesday according to my roommate!
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
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