can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
He is drunkenly eating my teddy grahms and making little growling noises as he bites the head off of each one.
just had sex with a midget and didnt wrap it... were totally gonna have a tv show :)
oh no you fucking didn't eat my mac and cheese you cunt
Last night you were talking while puking saying, "ahh the shoes and the purse, I'm gonna have to wash those"
I'm masturbating to football. This is why I get guys and you don't
dude you need a shock collar for some of the things you say when you're drunk.
If I die, I leave all my liquor in my apartment to you. Be a drunk bitch at my funeral. I wouldn't want it any other way.
How do I politely say my vagina is not a chew toy and if you bite me again I will slap you?
You could say take it easy, whoa there, be gentle, anything that doesn't fully convey the horror.
I had to have the guy I went out with last night come pick me up from the hotel the next morning after I ditched him for a firefighter..don't even talk to me about a walk of shame
I just power puked in the office bathroom.. blew blood vessels in my eyes and now I'm ready for a donut.... success
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
i feel like i shouldn't just had to send a text that said "no i will not eat your ass"
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
Randomize
