So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
I actually kind of like the booze poos. It's like a colon cleanse. I feel skinnier.
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
I just bought a vibrating toothbrush with my parents FSA insurance card because I'm too broke for a vibrator. New.Level.Of.Low.
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
We are two peas in an std pod
I could've eaten a live cat and wouldn't remember it today. That level of drunk.
You missed lesbians having sex in the bathroom and the whole bar clapping for them. I had to do recon. It was amazing
Ok so you know that's gonna be legally viewed as kidnapping, right?
No longer is one of my lifelong dreams to ride in a kangaroo pouch. You have eternally ruined that for me. Thank you.
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
Do you congratulate someone for having bigger tits, or is that a no no?
I'll be the Broncos and you be the Seahawks and you can pound the shit out of me.
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
I felt the need to set off fireworks in the living room while they were having sex upstairs. Yes, they quieted down.
Randomize
