We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
I thnk I just saw a monkey walking a drunk guy.
tell ils to like buy her flowers and like a balloon that says, sorry I tried to fuck your sister. I think hallmark makes some of those cards too.
wow... just woke up to find out that the OJ we used in my bong last night was poured back into the carton
I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
She tried to cook Velveeta IN the oven on clean mode.
I caught him trying to shit in her bed. I asked him why he was doing it and he said "because it's wrong."
I want to reach into my vagina and rip out my uterus with my bare hands. Understand how much it hurts now?
Hypothetical Question: Would you take a cougar bullet for me?
I feel like I'm laying on a pillow cloud. With little baby angel fingers between me and the cloud lifting me up. Singing hymns in my ear.
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
In the last six hours i have procured a free sandwich, watched three movies, and came to orgasm. If that isn't productivity then i don't know what is.
I just made my dating life into my own game show. would you like to meet the contestants? (photos not included)
Beer Olympics must happen in honor of the legit Olympics.
Randomize
