Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
Dude, it's gettin so bad even my fantasies just wanna be friends.
Just saw a white bronco on my way home from work and the license plate said "NOT OJ"
Ok so I could say "im sorry"...but instead ill just say "unsupervised...jager...military guys...green school bus called the juice box...and HUGE dick"
Is this the girl that wrote "Poon Slayer" across my chest?!
You rubbed your penis on my leg and said "people have paid for this kind of action"
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
Given he decided my interview was a date, showed up drunk and insisted on carrying me everywhere, we weren't off to a good start.
Didn't you used to babysit him?
18 years ago I helped him into his clothes. Today he helped me out of mine.
Stop it with the monkey emojis. It's like sexting with Curious George
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
Crust to egg proportion prescribes to a pedantic form of quiche. It's like saying breakfast pizza isn't pizza at all.
I smell like heartbreak.
Tequila and sloppy rebound sex?
How did you know?
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
hey sweets how's ur crotch today?
Randomize
