Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
you dont know how to answer ppls txts anymore?!?
im sorry, i don't get text messages.
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
Should I mail that cop his nightstick or just throw it away?
Sometimes I wonder how different my life would be if I didn't share a weekly margarita with my mom since i was 12
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
Saw you fall down on Jefferson and a cop drove by and shook his head. How you didnt get arrested after the party you went to on saturday is beyond me.
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
Just asphyxiate me and toss my corpse in the Ocean. It'll be easier than whatever the next four or eight years will bring.
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
A relationship is waiting for him to fall asleep so you can cum (finally!) while watching porn
You guys do the cocaine and I'll do the dishes.
I bought him flowers and fake vampire fangs, cuz there's really not a greeting card that says "Sorry I got wasted last night and started a very sloppy bloodletting ritual.".
Randomize
