if sarah has 12 dollars and spends 6 of it on cheap booze how much will she spend on hangover food the next morning?
4 on the dollar menu at mcdonalds
mom cant say that college never taught us math
See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
you haven't felt a hangover until you wake up after a night of snorting tequila.
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
Stripper told me "sorry i'm not squezing my tits in your face much, I just had a kid and don't want to squirt you in the eye with milk. " in the middle of my lap dance
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
Dude, I think shitting blood should be a cause for concern not celebration that you had a great night.
I don't think I can look at him the same way anymore after he walked in my room wearing a short skirt with a boner.
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
Not sure if you're still doing the whole "sleeping with only one person" thing but if you're not we should sleep together when I get back in town tonight.
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
After getting rejected by him, I got a strangely pleasant dick pic from an unknown number with the caption: "I hope this gets you through the night ;)" It's like the Cock-Gods were shining down upon me.
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
Randomize
