Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
i just remebered that we smoked out my hamster yesterday...
i hope hes still alive. i just remember you give him a shit load of cereal and saying "trust me your going to need it"
We drove around last night shotting fireworks out the window while they had sex in the back of his car
Just had an old man tip me two dollars and say "here put this in your baby fund, you'll have a baby someday" I swear this is gods way of saying GET ON BIRTH CONTROL NOW!
Exactly. This is the bit where I learn a heartwarming lesson about not making my drinks half vodka
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
We had to take the hinges off the bathroom door. Needless to say, you are no longer welcome at that bar
You said you couldn't look at me because you would have to take off your sunglasses but you can't because they're the "guides to your eyes".
He's like a Lana del Rey song that took human form
I sleep better at night when I win things. I never really weep for others.
I walked out ot my car in the morning thinking there was a sandwich I left there from yesterday. Then later that day I was checking the mail and saw the other side of my car :/
It concerns me the most that u were potentially going to eat a day old car sandwich.
I just bought a butt plug on Amazon prime day and you're the only person I felt would appreciate that decision
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
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