hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
the stripper made me go home becuz she had to take her kid to a birthday party in the morning
'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
You were telling me to give my phone mouth to mouth so it wouldn't die.. Should i be worried for you?
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
Most eventful shower ever. Jacked off, peed and puked in there.
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
Dude found out there's an open bar at the celebration of life thing for my grandma which is at noon. Now I know why I can drink so much
Oh my god. I just RAN OVER a child. Oh my god this isnt my day. That kid was cool as fuck though
when I said energy drinks I meant cocaine
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
I mean, on what planet are nipples suppose to look like that?
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
Come help me clean and have sexual intercourse with me
Bring breadsticks
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
Randomize
