Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
I just spent the last hour spooning with my drug dealer.
I'm not ok right now. I just walked in on a 600lb woman passed out on the toilet and she walked out and tried to eat her cell phone. I'm on acid I think.
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
Just downloaded the entire Justin Bieber album sober.. I think you know how I'm doing.
he was extremely fucked up- he thought my sports bra was his boxers. even when his leg wouldnt fit. at least whiskey dick wasnt a problem
Highlight of the week: I had sex with a B movie star wearing an eye patch.
Almost just bought a peacock. I need to get off Craigslist
She asked if I wanted to "Mormon Motorboat" her, which I guess is just motor-boating her through her cloths. Turns out I did.
we broke the bed, curtan rods, a dresser drawer, and unless I didn't notice it before, we put a hole in the wall. This is why he and I have to fuck in motels.
You know your horny when you have a sex dream about Ace Ventura, if your wondering he's awful
If I don't answer right away it's because I took an Adderall and the fridge needs cleaned.
I just told 2 of my vibrators "I love you." I seriously need some dick.
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