i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
My Blind Date Arrived. She looks like something I'd draw with my left hand.
I want to figure out a way to work "if you suddenly die, I might turn into an extreme hoarders" into my valentines day poem
Told him I'd blow him in the bathroom. There was a giant window everyone was looking thru. He whipped it out n I burst out laughing n walked away. Even blackout drunk I set the bar high. You should be proud.
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
I just saw a stripper light her nipples on fire. Im terrified and impressed all at the same time
last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite.
the bad thing about being great at twerking is that I'm powerless to stop myself from doing it when I'm drunk and in public.
It's like the first time your mom catches you masturbating. We both know what she saw. We're just not talking about it...
Still pimpin that dick in the cornfields. Now it's just transferred to the local bar.
And for the record I didn't even have sex last night. I threw up in his toilet and slept in his bed until noon
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
Randomize
