At a bar where three women in denim shorts are debating techniques and skillsets for wrangling goats. You stay classy Delaware.
and in the morning, while we were eating breakfast, she was all " i think someone sneezed into my shirt..." she'll never know.
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
I hooked up with some guy to get over my ex last night. I was terrified until we started doing naked pushups.
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
Im at that shitty point in my day where I start planning night activities while finger dipping vyvance off of my desk, you got any plans?
Went kayaking. drunk. DID NOT FALL IN. Mission succesful.
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
We don't have paper towels so I microwaved a spinach/egg sandwich thingy wrapped in toilet paper. Toilet paper. so that's how my day started.
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
If you dont get laid dressed as Woody Harrelson in Zombieland, I have lost all faith in the men of nw Indiana.
So. Much. Porn.
Randomize
