i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
I want you to know that wearing office supplies as jewelry results in waking up with the wrong roommate. Also, strip clubs and vodka don't mix.
handjob tips. give me some.
It's alarming how good I'm getting at being productive at work on Thursday after Johnny Walker Wednesdays.
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
There is a really great story behind the missing Coco Puffs and vodka mystery
In the world of sexual, erotic texting, you rank somewhere between "how much teeth do you want" and "how dry do you want it"
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
The strip club incident sums up our friendship pretty well
I just saw a stripper light her nipples on fire. Im terrified and impressed all at the same time
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
Come get your boyfriend. He is hammered talking to me about hot dogs and casinos.
Randomize
