Sorry I thought I was a lizard earlier.
I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
wait do you know what youre gonna say if they ask how youre getting back?
yes. helicopter.
Apologies for hacking your facebook and posting that picture of you passed out hooked up to the IV...but we were sat with you on the ER floor for 3 hours, it got boring
You call it a hangover, I call it a baby squirrel burrowing its way out of my head.
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
I may have just unintentionally roofied a man in a wheelchair
Gosh, I don't even have that. Let alone someone to tie me up and whip me with Twizzlers.
She wants to go as a facebook "like" for halloween, but right now her costume looks more like the hamburger helper hand with broken fingers.
Don't tell me 'the Fonzie' doesn't work. Went to see Shakespeare high and gave the sign to the dude playing Macbeth. Now at a cast party getting blown. All hail the Fonz.
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
I'm tired of you and your emotional constipation. WHY DO YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES WHEN WE MAKE LOVE!?
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
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