Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
can't come out tonight. went to the bar again last night and the bartender hugged and thanked me so much for my "generosity." I'm intrigued but terrified to see my credit card bill.
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
Omg just woke up. 6am. random apartment. broad daylight. bunch of ppl doin coke around me. Theres a bridge nearby. I think my dentist is down the block. Oof.
Just thought i should tell someone im on the roof, if i pass out up here because no one found me, im behind the chimney
Did you write your name in the dust on our toilet tank?
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
I am now the only person in my apartment who hasn't had sex in my bed.
Aside from the slim chance of pregnancy, I'm gonna call last night a raging success.
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
I just spent a pre-4th of july celebration riding in a raft being towed by a car through a town that I've never heard of handing out flyers for a river rafting company that I never knew existed. Good night.
Returning my drunken purchases from last night. Not a single thing I bought was on sale.
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
I went to Walmart last night to buy some CDs--which is a sentence I never thought I'd say in 2016.
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
Randomize
