If i come over, it means nothing
Skinny jeans should not be made in size 14. Then, it's just a lie.
before you smothered your pizza in mayo you blotted it with a napkin saying you were trying to watch your fat intake
I just used celery as a chaser. That's the level of my refrigerator.
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
Upside of a two-day migraine: thanks to a prominent "E" in the middle of every pill, I think we can totally pass off Excedrine Migraine as ecstasy to stupid, drunk freshman. This is totally going to happen. That entrepreneurship course is paying off.
I want to start this convo out by apologizing for the broken toaster.
im still going. this is my new reality. also. dont take glowsticks in the bath. they explode. actually. do. it. its beautiful.
i dont think thats healthy man...
Whiskey and I have a long and stories tradition of excellence
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
I just got high off one hit and the. Spent 20 minutes inspecting the gasket of our refridgerator and researching ways to replace it
HE ASKED IF I HAD SIBLINGS WHEN I ASKED HIM TO LICK MY ASSHOLE
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
Split a bottle of Johnny Walker and then decided to eat a shit ton of peanut butter. That was a rough bed to wake up in
She just texted me saying "come over and eat me out, my vagina smells like honey glazed ham." I know I shouldn't be, but i'm just so curious.
Randomize
