to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
Hashbrowns don't come out your nose as easily as you would think
i dont even know how to be here
I thought I walked in on an orgy of smurfs. Man I love shrooms
Please ignore everything I told you about my girlfriends vagina last night.
He ended our Skype call with, "I'm going to poop and then go play my ukulele in the park."
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
When we missed a fist bump and simultaneously did the Rocket Power handshake I knew I was going to blow him.
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
I really need to get a comfy set of masturbating shoes
It's a family event: you have to drink. No way around it. Its the law.
We ended the night eating peanutbutter with our hands and smoking cigarettes in the house at 4am. Fucking Everclear, man.
I mean, drunk me really liked him, maybe sober me will too. Who am I to deny fate?
Randomize
