I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
I can't finish this paper in my room because every time I get distracted I start masterbating. I think it's time to go to the library...
this one can actually spell my name, that's a shoe-in
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
Note to self not a good idea to try and make out with a girl when she's crying over her boyfriend
we drunkly made out in the middle of the street beside the homeless guy playing the flute. Not how I imagined our first kiss.
I've never felt so epic in my entire life as I do right now, my bare testicles staring down the ocean itself
Thanks for not locking your door. I had to pee and there was a random person throwing up in my bathroom so I used yours. \nPS I stole your soap
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
We took your mom out drinking and we wound up winning 18 games of Flip Cup. You have amazing genetics.
So then I got so stoned I sat and took my pulse for 10 minutes.
He's eating me out right now. That's how bad he is.
As you were falling you yelled out, "save my burrito!" Priorities
Randomize