I'm not crazy, I only keep calling you cause you won't pick up.
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
let me put this in terms we both understand. he was the crunchwrap supreme of men--the perfect combo of all things manly, gooey and delicious. and ready for instant enjoyment.
Drinking down Plan B with a 5 hour energy. Winding down welcome week in style.
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
We told you to go get more fire wood and you came running back with a log that was on fire, not drunk at all.
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
I got really upset at the McDonald's worker. They should serve nuggets 24/7. Apparently 5am is breakfast for some people.
Lusting after Beyonce when you're a lesbian is like having a crush on Jesus. You just don't do it.
I just KNEW this was gonna happen. NEVER say "all the free Jameson you can drink" around Tina.
The one that slept in my truck and you peed in his face?
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
Dude, you screamed I AM THE WALRUS while giving a statue of Ronald McCdonald a lapdance. You were NOT sober.
Randomize
