how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
I just had to blow my nose on a mcdonalds receipt in my car. Its time to stop doing coke.
Oh, and that ugly chick transformed into a veritable goddess when she came back at 3AM with a handle of vodka and 100 chicken wings
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
The cops said we could pay $250 or spend the night in jail and get 2 free meals. I might pee in mail-boxes more often
So the crazy cock blocking bitch sent her a picture of her boobs using MY phone and said: he's busy at the moment
My night ended with a French cab driver offering me his sperm free of cost.
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
I'm bonding with your girlfriend. I like her. We're plotting your demise.
Every day I wake up and there is no spectacular morning wood waiting for me I get so sad.
Why is the microwave staring at me?!
Randomize
