I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
Umm you don't wanna know how many "I'm sorry for calling you last night" fb wallposts I just had to write...
we're making bets on your personal life
two fat guys on crotch rockets just invited me to 'party' with them at a del taco. why does this keep happening to me?
i'm gonna start fucking more girls with asthma. help feed my ego.
Time to do stuff I know I'll have to hide from my grandkids one day and everyone at next weekends wedding.
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
Trying to figure out why my back is hurting. And then I remember I got fucked up against a tree last night
He caught a Pokemon on my head while I sucked him off. I think I need to marry him.
the fact you finally accept your bi don't shock me but as your fuck buddy I expect you girls to go family style on me
I just realized that Margarita Wednesdays are so much better now when followed by No Work Thursdays.
Randomize
