she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
I wish i could put a picture of my ass of my resume...that seems to be the only way i will ever get hired
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
Putting a positive pregnancy test next to my condoms in my drawer so I remember why I always need to use condoms
I just went into a strangers house to have a spoonful of sugar to cure my hiccups, wtf is wrong with me
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
I cried over the lack of milkshakes I've consumed in the last month
Like my new perfume? It's a combination of Fireball, sex and bad decisions.
This is possibly the most humiliating moment of my life. I have diarrhea, in a port-a-potty, at the Renaissance Festival.
Someone just asked me why I drink so much. Im gonna slap a bitch
Do you think my laundromat will notice that the bloodstain on my sheets is in the shape of a face?
I heard a crunch while giving him head. I looked up and he was eating Cheese Itz. So we made a deal that he'd take a hand job so I could eat them too.
That's good to know, because I will be doing terrible things to you. Terrible things, John, wicked, evil, maniacal things shall happen to you and I will have the audacity to call it sex
STILL COMPLETELY OKAY WITH THIS
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