Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
Come put a leash on your gf. She just challenged 8 cops to a wrestling match for 'tag team champion of the world'
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
It feels wrong to have dick mouth at a family dinner.
dude she looked like Newman from Seinfeld I'm done with this wingman shit
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
P.S. It's common courtesy to let the girl your banging know if she's about to walk into the same place your girlfriend is at so she can get her poker face ready
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
Everybody needs breakup sex. You just happened to get yours from a dude who hasn't reached the point of breakup yet. No biggie.
All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
Just found a note on the bed that said "Dear mittens, had to leave early I'll be back soon."
WTF? Are you mittens?
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
what a classic moment of my life. A buffet of taco bell and a taser gun.
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
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