I found out 2day that my dad was a stripper in New Oleans.
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
You were in my dream and you got the lyrics to lollipop tattooed on your chest. Don't get it, it wasnt that cool.
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
I just Tebowed the shit out of her.
Nice and you can't use "Tebow" in the place of every verb.
I'm seeing how long I can hold this wine in my mouth. I have so many adventures! I'm like Teddy Ruxpin!
is there a reason blood came out of my hair in the shower?
head injury at diner. you headbutted the wall a few times because it got in your way
You made out with two different species that night
I think a girl on my floor is watching zombie porn. There is literally no other description for the noise coming from her room.
umm, I just masturbated to old Justin timberlake on MTV jams. in need of dick ASAP
At the bar, some guy bumped into you and you screamed "hey, don't touch what you can't afford sunshine!"
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
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