i just woke up i smell like fire, i have bruises on both knees and one elbow, i have a lighter and nip of smirnoff blueberry in my bed, rug burn on one hip and about 12 pics of you and me on my camera-this needs to stop happening
yea ive got to shower which is going to be painful given the skin burns from the blowup obstacle course races last night
Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
The dry cleaners wouldn't even take our clothes. That's how bad of a night it was.
Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.
I picked the lock on the bathroom door and sang him a song while he pooped. Why is he mad?
After a couple hours you decided you were going to walk home but ten minutes later you called and said you'd puked by the side of the road and you needed us to drive you to the art museum.
Text me back. Urgent. It is a porta Keep the portal alive.
Is this the acid talking?
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
Last night you made me help you pick the raisins out of a kashi bar and acted like it was the most important thing to ever happen to you or our friendship
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
I've been sober for almost two weeks and it's been the worst two weeks ever. Even my mom told me I need to start drinking again.
If I die bedazzle my coffin please.
its as if im in a choose your own adventure book. except im not the reader and someone else is choosing my fate...one awesome decision at a time.
Randomize
