what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
hey you didnt make it to our afterparty what happened?
Ran around with a boom box broke a trampoline float, had a girl lick my ear the usual
i have some very unhappy turtles in my backseat
Dude. He drives a mini. Therefore he's a virgin
Also we decided you're the person whose going to die at my bachelor party...do the math you're the most logical choice
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
If you fuck her, Im going to call you and I want you to cough 2 times.
Your doorknob is in my back seat, in case you were looking for it.
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
Her Grandmother felt me up AND paid for dinner. If she doesn't get her shit together I'm gonna be her Step Grandfather.
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
just saw two eagle scouts making out in chic-fil-a
I broke my wrist trying to give him a blow job...
And this is why we can’t have nice things
And, by “make you dinner” I mean “have lots of sex and multiple orgasms.” So you should probably eat something and before you come over
And hydrate too
Randomize
