I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
Call me at 7:30 and make sure I'm not asleep in this booth at Waffle House.
I don't know how God could bestow someone that emotionally confused with such an awesome penis.
You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
I got him a footlong to apologize for trying to push him off a balcony...
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
Woke up under the lifeguard stand sleeping next to mitch our homeless friend. I bartered a summer wardrobe for his last 5 dollar to buy a bfast sandwich. Bring clothes
I almost tried texting you with my pipe. Holy fuck this is good shit.
I just had a very enlightening conversation with my hat. we need more of whatever the fuck that was.
i woke up at 4 pm face down on my hardwood living room floor. i would say its a new low but i think I found my new napping spot
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
My mom's yelling at me for being a whore and my dad's quizzing me on how to drive in winter weather....I'm home!
My cats name is now jello shot. How much do you love me right now?
I woke up with what has to be a whole pack of smarties loose in my bra. Was that your fault?
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