vicodin is the reason why I believe in magic
dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high
worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave
nevermind....I'm on the way
Man, the last time I saw you you were giving me a thumbs up while being pulled out the bar by your belt from some girl.
You couldve had sex with 2 drunk chicks on an alligator slide.
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
I just handed the barista at Starbucks a panty liner instead of my card....maybe I should upgrade this Tall to a Venti...
He told his ice cream cone it 'looked cute' and then started to cry. The Dairy Queen people were not pleased.
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
Randomize
