so I guess it's not okay to mix vodka and ..everything and then proceed to offer a lap dance to ...everyone.
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
He did the "not my house dance." Apparently it involves spreading cereal on the floor and then grinding into the carpet in bare feet while singing "not my house" over and over and dancing.
Walked in on my boss having phone sex at work... and somehow this didnt bother nor embaress him
Everybody knows the last week of summer internships include showing up to the office hammered and hitting on the CEO
I thought 4 percs were too many but I'm dumping Gogurt on apple pie and taking giant bong rips. This feels right.
gladiator or hannah montana?
This is why I never have to ask who you are when I get a new phone.
He motorboated me, gave me a business card that said congratulations on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new.
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
It's not a walk of shame if you run
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
sorry i got drunk at sunday brunch and force fed carrot sticks to your cat
Randomize
