ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
i actually looked down at my cock today and said "whoa buddy, you need a haircut....(grimace) and a shower"
She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
i cant text you anymore tonight, God gave me two hands for two cups
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
So I'm seriously debating forwarding these sexts to his horse faced new gf including the ones that say he still loves me... but I still need his check to clear... decisions decisions
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
I really don't want to. I just don't know how to nicely say "dude I'm having a rough time in life right now and I just need to dress like a stripper cop, get shit faced, and have dirty crazy sex"
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
I asked if anyone's pants felt wet on the bottom, like a half hour after mine did. I had just peed my pants i had gotten so high no biggie
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
I'm sorry about the spring break comment. I won't make anymore pornos, I promise.
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
I texted her mom a picture of us doing it saying "I'm trying to make your daughter just like you!" she was not amused.
Randomize
