ps i may or may not be wearing a sequined bra
Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
Who knew that being in a committed relationship is the same thing as forced celibacy? Did not sign up for this.
after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
Remember the time we were in the hospital and I wanted to steel the arm restraints and use them as sex toys?? Oh college memories....
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
well we called the liquor store to tell them to stay open five more minutes so we could make it and they recognized our voices. I've never been more proud.
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
Well if homeless lesbian experimenting divorcée is your new M.O., you're gonna need to start drinking more anyway so if that's what it takes to talk about it tomorrow afternoon, bottoms up bitch
A gay dude just spanked me with a nicholas sparks novel and called me foxy. I'm putting this on my resume.
She made me pour olive oil on her.
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
Randomize
