There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
I just woke up and i'm wearing a cape and it says sup slut on my ass
I like how you refer to peeing in the car as "super cute"
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
So... I'm really sorry I tried to sell you to random people in cars last night
i am breaking up with you. because you wash your hair too much and you only drink light beer and because you're not party enough.
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
This weekend is gunna be a fucking shitshow. I don't even wanna know how many dicks will end up inside of me
I feel like I have two modes: Super fuckin high, or super giddy from caffeine. I have learned to accept this.
I guess I'm just gonna have to learn to live with the fact that I'm the guy who takes his pants off at the party and tries to start an orgy
I had no idea he had such passive aggressive animalistic tendencies. This is the human equivalent of peeing on someone.
The cat be actin like a 2:30 am poop is the time to tell me all about her thoughts and fears in life. No bitch, this is definitely alone time.
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
He's just been a dick since he set his face on fire. I just wanted to eat a fucking hot dog.
When God closes one door, he opens up a taller, smarter, more successful door, with a bigger cock and nicer teeth.
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