i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
he asked me what things i liked that he did in bed, and i told him all the things i hated so he would use it on that new bitch and she wouldnt hook up with him anymore.
you for real need to get over him dude
I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
Somehow I managed to make my Dunkin Donuts uniform look slutty. And I'm not even wearing hoops.
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
Actually, what with the curvature of the Earth, it's faster to leave from Washington. And Google maps recommends kayaking instead of swimming.
I'm not entirely sure what happened last night, but I think I dislocated my kneecap during an epic Mario Kart battle...
I woke up in an apt hallway this morning and a nice lady brought me coffee cause she thought I was homeless
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
I mean, he's 40, foreign, artsy but with substance abuse problems and estranged children. How is he not my type?
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
It’s official. I’ve hooked up with all three brothers now
You should go after Dad now
I should! He’s definitely middle age fuckable
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