You dont ever try to use your dick as a power washer to get bits of poop of the toilet bowl?
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
He just called shotgun on the way to the squad car.
the bottle said: caution extremely flammable. so that was my motivation.
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
So i'm in a museum and theres a punch bowl from 1765 with a picture of 3 men forcing the 4th to drink the punch bowl. Colonial hazing
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
so the good news is that i can't possibly burn my eyelashes off tonight at the bbq.
It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking.
I was telling my friend about your penis and the only word I could think of was voluptuous. You have a voluptuous dick.
She's passed out with a slice of pizza between her boobs should I just eat it and leave
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
I woke up this morning to find myself laying in a beer puddle with "I'm sorry" written on the shaft of my dick and Nicole was nowhere to be found. Gotta love her
Even if they did assume we were doing kinky shit, it's not like they're gonna be like, "HALT SATAN! INTAKE SOME JESUS AND VOMIT YOUR SINS!"
Randomize
