it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
I woke up naked by my window. blinds open. smiley face drawn on my window.
do you know how hard it is to sit through a 3 hour movie with someone and not fuck them?
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
There is a large, jolly black gentleman in the parking lot of my appartment complex yelling about 5am jelly doughnuts. I want to be where he's at.
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
Went to the elf storage building to help him get his old dresser. Found his brother's stash in the drawer and ended up passed out w him on the mattress in there instead.
If your plan is to re-bang every girl you banged in high school - you're gonna need a spread sheet and clip board.
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
You are the ghost of drunk bitches past, present, and future.
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
I made her pull the car over 5 times to puke because she was going to fast, apparently she was only going 30mph...
So just spent 30 minutes of my life talking to my cousins friend who told me she buys cocaine from a pizza place by asking for extra Parmesan
Randomize
