Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
I'm on the bus going to class. And a cop just rolled by and I got nervous because I didn't have my seatbelt on. I have to stop smoking so much weed.
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
she walked out and i tried to get her to come back but i couldn't remember her name so i just whistled... future reference: that doesn't work
You know what's worse than asking for the morning after pill? Asking for the morning after pill in a sketchy hospital in a foreign country where no one speaks English.
You were walking away to pee and as you were undoing your belt you looked at me and said "the belt is off. the game is on. Remever that."
Oh my god. That was the best half-hour of my life that didn't involve genitals.
Also, your girlfriend apologized to me about yesterday. That was nice of the cunt.
You thought you were Snapchating on your tablet, but were really just poking John Stamos' face on my Full House dvd case...
I can't hangout tonight, I have a phone sex appointment at 10
I think we might need a safe word for this...
Heard about your divorce. Let me know if I can do anything for you or your penis ;-)
Randomize
