Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
I don't even remember his name...i'm just gonna save it as birthday sex
I came home drunk to my night light on and a Hershey's bar on my bed. Mom knows me too well.
Nice. Don't spend your therapist's co-pay on Jaeger bombs.
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
Apparently this is my life now. Fucking men in their 30s with small dogs.
BING! You are now free to move about my panties. He just left for work.
I SHIT YOU NOT a mailman helped me leave without waking him up.
Captain Morgan does not know self control. Nor does he teach it.
He got punched in the face last night? By who? I’ll invite him to our formal. Seriously.
I puked in the back of my mom's new car because I had too much to drink at Chilis. I think I just hit rock bottom.
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize
