new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
I've been living off of popsicles and broth.
My 16 year old neighbor is throwing a rager cuz her parents are out of town and my brother and I are sitting on the porch listening to A) someone fuck on the trampoline B) a girl bawling about her parents finding out C) someone puking in what we think is the hot tub. And overall we take a shot everytime someone says "bra"
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning.
I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation.
He said we would have a beautiful daughter together. That way too much for a one night stand...
I'm fucking a man old enough to be my father who is also dating my boss. What have you done with your life?
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
HE LIVES IN ANOTHER STATE
actually scratch that last text, he's the perfect boyfriend. He stays faithful and doesnt find out about all the guys here. it's a win-win
Oh and it’s been a year according to my snap chat memories since I banged your cousin in your sons truck pulled over on Elm St! 😂😂😂😬😳😇
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