It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
I know I'm really high but I swear I just saw him beating off to his fantasy football roster.
he asked me if i wanted "a hit" off his inhaler. its definitely time for a new roommate
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
i had to get the starbucks manager to open the bathroom door for me...you passed out on the floor, the things i do for you
im sorry for trying to flush a roll of toilet paper down with my puke. probably not great for your toilet
I had a great time except for the part where you called another guy, told him you were in a cab - not on a date - and that you'd meet him at a bar in 15 minutes. but besides that it was awesome. Next time capping you at two glasses of wine
Then he rubbed shampoo all over my arm and shouted, "Garnier FUCK THIS."
Spotify knows me way to well. You mention swinger club and guess what it shuffles to? Danger Zone by Kenny Loggins
I hate closet cases. I've been wooing this chick the entire quarantine. We finally meet up tonight, we're two drinks in, I've got my hand half way up her skirt and her husband calls. She promised to bring home dinner.
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