what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
I'm pretty sure this all started when I found a vibrator in my mom's sock drawer and had my first orgasm when I was ten...
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
cracked out the beer snorkel again. that thing has a five for five record of getting me naked.
Too high to move please buy hi-c and pour it in my mouth in exchange I will marry your first born child
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
Until they make a bed that bathes you in your sleep, I will not be satisfied.
Just turned down sex because it's a holy day of obligation, my mom would be proud.
YOU WORK IN THE US CAPITOL! YOU CANNOT HAVE SEX IN THE BATHROOM!!
Dude, you are totally ruining intern season for me...
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
You cried for a while then lifted lots of weights then cady's ex put glitter on your tits and then you took a nap. I got you pizza and brought you home. Nothing too exciting.
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
not sure if destroying him emotionally was worth it but damn it's a fucking hilarious story
It's really hard to tweet with a pussy in your face demanding attention.
I am become drunk, destroyer of all worlds
Randomize
