I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
Where are you?
In a non slutty way
yesterday i saw a blind man guiding himself into a NYC tour bus... and i thought i waste money
if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life
with a huge shlong
massive. i wanna make bitches cry
I'm bringing in a picture of a stranger on facebook to get my haircut. I have reached a new level of creepy.
You had already cockblocked me. The cops were just an assist.
I ended up in a shower with 9 people and a bunch of unopened beer last night. I think I got peed on. Hands were everywhere. We sold the peed on beer to people knocking on the hotel room door.
Wow, now I'm sad I didn't go.
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
I don't remember its real name, I just call it the Harrison Ford Cush after that idea with the Indiana Jones mask. I should just get high and sell people my ideas for their Halloween costumes all the time. I'd make a fucking fortune.
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
She makes me want to eat babies and throw kittens in pots of boiling water.
My breasts were aching with rage.
What is more embarrassing, shitting yourself in Mexico or having sex in a forest preserve with a 19 yr old? This is crucial research.
Pretty sure this ice cream truck is following me.
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
Randomize
