I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
so i stopped by cvs on the way home this morning, turns out hallmark doesnt make an im sorry my friend puked on your friend card, call me if were still speaking
dude my grandmas the shit. she has a sixth grade education and got hit by a car when she was 18. she cant smell.
is it sad that i can masturbate and get my big O just from thinking about a Tiffany engagement ring?
I want to see you every morning in the kitchen ass naykid on roller blades making pancakes.
Stop sending me these texts. This is your mom, not your girlfriend.
I found the pot of gold last night, and it was full of bad decisions.
Just woke up from a dream where you lived in a gingerbread house on a snowy cliff by the sea. The dolphins were swimming away from a giant dust storm. You REALLY ought to smoke this before bed tonight.
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
My plan to masturbate 34 times on my 34th birthday backfired. Do you still have those crutches?
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
Have bite marks on my arm where my temporary tat was Saturday night. Did someone try to bite Captain America or something?
One of the many mysteries surrounding the weekend...
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
I'm bringing pajamas, aspirin, morning after clothes and morning after pill
Randomize
