But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
every time I see Anne Hathaway all I can think is "my cousin fucked a guy who fucked her" and it makes me proud.... so I want to say thank you for being that cousin.
He practically bottle-fed me Jameson, like I was a baby chimpanzee on those nature specials.
hey, do you know how many packets of jello it takes to turn a handle of vodka into slutty girls?
I'm not being over dramatic, but I think my heart is going to stop beating.
It was a new level of awkwardness and terror. The high schoolers you fuck in the summer should never introduce themselves to your mom and godmother
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
one renamed every person in my phone 'I lpvw tewqils', so it would really help me out if you could text me your name. Happy sunday!
This 35 year old just told me that he was headed to the dance floor and it was about to get real dangerous......was that an invite?
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
He asked me the next morning if he fell asleep inside of me. Drunk is an understatement.
You gotta have 1 orgasm for me and the rest can be for you. I'm living vicariously through you 😂
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
I’M PUT OFF FROM FOOD RN BC EARLIER I GOT SOME WATER AND I WAS 4 SIPS IN WHEN I NOticed A FUCKING BURGER KING F R Y IN MY D R I N K
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